Episode 22 - A win is a win, ok?

This week is a proper life-update episode, and there's a lot to get through. Rhiannon opens with a 20-minute saga about a UK-exclusive Stickman Book Week costume that went missing for days, involved a full panic spiral, an actual Etsy tarot reading, and a search through every storage tub in the house — before turning up in a laundry bag the whole time. Alisha, meanwhile, had her own Book Week near-miss involving a garage door, a trapped car, and a very fast walk to school dressed as Pig the Pug.

From there the conversation gets into something genuinely useful: what an ADHD medication review actually involves once you're diagnosed, why it happens every two years, and why the cost of that appointment quietly prices some people out of staying on their medication. Rhiannon shares her own experience moving up a dosage and the very real anxiety of knowing there's a ceiling she'll eventually hit.

The back half of the episode is a decluttering and systems deep-dive — Rhiannon has officially finished her Wall of Doom boxes (five bags and two tubs of rubbish gone), and she and Alisha compare notes on the "everything that doesn't belong here goes in a tub" method versus a Marie Kondo-style category sort, plus a genuinely impressive rundown of the custom iPhone automations Rhiannon built to get her calendar, reminders and daily to-dos working together without another app.

It closes on something heavier and lighter at once: Alisha's unexpected tears over Dolly Parton's death, and a wider conversation about why grieving a celebrity who's simply always been there — a Dolly, a Queen, a Robin Williams — is a completely normal, very human response, especially for brains wired for strong attachment.

What We Talk About in This Episode

• A listener message about relating to Rhiannon's AUDHD content more than pure ADHD content, and the value of hosting two different neurotypes on one show
• The Stickman Book Week costume saga: a UK-exclusive item, a full panic spiral, an Etsy tarot reading, and finding it in the last place anyone would look
• Alisha's own Book Week near-miss: a blocked garage, a trapped car, and getting dressed as Pig the Pug in five minutes flat
• What an ADHD psych medication review actually involves, why it's required every two years, and why the cost can be prohibitive for people who need it most
• Revisiting the ongoing question of whether to pursue diagnosis or medication for their daughters, and a GP's advice to reassess around puberty
• Rhiannon's medication dosage increase (50mg to 60mg), building tolerance over time, and the anxiety of knowing there's a maximum dose
• The Wall of Doom boxes: officially, completely gone — five bags and two tubs of rubbish cleared out
• The "everything that doesn't belong on this surface goes in a tub" decluttering method, and why it beats trying to sort everything perfectly the first time
• Comparing that method to a Marie Kondo-style category sort (Alisha's approach with her wardrobe), and why neither method works for every kind of clutter
• "Pockets of organisation": aesthetically pleasing drawers next to doom boxes that still haven't been dealt with
• Why digital planners don't stick for ADHD brains, and the ongoing index card system progress (and self-judgment about handwriting)
• Rhiannon's custom iPhone Shortcuts automations: a 3am daily pull of all calendars into a reminders list, a "Deal With This Later" photo shortcut, a "Things For Later" bookmarking shortcut, and a voice-to-text "Brain Dump"/"Word Vomit" shortcut
• Comparing ChatGPT and Claude for building step-by-step tech projects when you need everything explained in detail
• Using Alexa as a shared household to-do list, and wishing all the different systems talked to each other
• Kindergarten news-and-show-and-tell chaos, and losing track of items mid-declutter
• The "speed bump" brain: why a changed plan or a person arriving early can completely derail your ability to function that morning
• Crying over Dolly Parton's death, the Imagination Library book programme, and explaining grief to a six-year-old
• Parasocial relationships and "generational cornerstones" — why grieving someone you've never met but who's always been part of your life is a real and valid response
• Two pieces of good news to end on: strong feedback from Alisha's membership beta group, and Rhiannon's daughter's first solo in a musical theatre performance

Key Takeaways

• ADHD medication reviews (often required every two years once diagnosed) exist to check how the medication is actually affecting you, not to "catch" anyone — but the cost of the appointment itself can make ongoing access to medication prohibitively expensive for some people.
• A decluttering method doesn't have to be perfect to work: putting everything that doesn't belong in a space into one tub, then sorting it later, gets a room visibly tidy fast — even if the sorting still has to happen eventually.
• Different clutter needs different systems. A category-based sort (like Marie Kondo's method) can work brilliantly for one type of clutter (clothes) and completely fall apart for a house full of mixed, scattered belongings.
• A sudden change of plan — someone arriving early, an unexpected interruption — can create a genuine "speed bump" in an ADHD or autistic brain's ability to function, not just mild annoyance. It's not about being difficult; it's a real access issue.
• Grieving a public figure you've never met is a normal, valid response, especially when that person has been a genuine "cornerstone" of your life for decades. Parasocial attachment is a real phenomenon, not something to be embarrassed about.

Who This Episode Is For

Anyone who's ever spiralled over a lost costume the week it was actually needed. Anyone wondering what an ADHD medication review costs and why it exists. Parents trying to find a decluttering system that survives real life with kids. And anyone who felt a genuine pang of grief over a celebrity death this week and wondered if that was a normal thing to feel (it is).

A Message From This Episode

Progress doesn't have to be dramatic to count — a finished Wall of Doom, a tub of sorted clutter, a system that's still a work in progress, they're all wins. And it's okay to feel real grief over people who've simply always been part of your life, even if you never met them. Your feelings are valid, whether they're about a lost costume, a hard appointment, or a loss the rest of the world might not expect you to feel so deeply.

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