Episode 26: I'm going to fight until I get bored

Both hosts have picked up a new hobby in the last week, and neither is remotely surprised. They are three weeks out from a Hong Kong Disney trip with friends and four small kids, which Alisha has turned into a full creative project: matching t-shirts made on her Cricut with iron-on vinyl, "Disney bounding" outfit plans, and bedazzled sneakers for the kids (and herself) so nobody is clip-clopping around the park in dress-up heels. Rhiannon has fallen into cross stitch and embroidery after buying kits for her daughter, then buying many more for herself, then discovering she'd accidentally bought embroidery instead.

The episode opens with a very good week: school holidays that finally have some rhythm, a bush-school day outdoors, and a first-ever two-wheeler bike ride — plus the saga of a six-centimetre plastic spider named Spidey, who now has a handbag, a ribbon harness and a Halloween costume to match. From there the hosts dig into the "hobby graveyard" every ADHD and AuDHD household knows: the knitting, the sewing, the Lego, the crates of half-finished kits, and the habit of offloading a lapsed hobby onto another neurodivergent friend.

It's a warm, funny episode about hyperfocus, perfectionism (especially when your child "does it wrong"), and trying to find hobbies that give your brain something to do that isn't your phone.

What We Talk About in This Episode

• Why a week outdoors in the sunshine has made such a difference to mood in the school holidays
• A six-centimetre plastic spider called Spidey, and the handbag, ribbon harness and Halloween costume that followed
• A first ride on a two-wheeler bike, and the "I'm going to do this now" determination of a neurodivergent kid
• Preparing for a Hong Kong Disney trip: Disney bounding, matching outfits, Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique and iron-on vinyl t-shirts
• Bedazzled sneakers as a compromise to avoid high-heel arguments at the park
• Falling down a cross stitch and embroidery rabbit hole — and discovering you've bought embroidery instead
• Buying multiples of something you love "in case it breaks" (four identical dresses and three matching kits)
• The hobby that is also a stain-removal obsession, and why "just buy new ones" isn't the point
• Being "not crafty by nature" but determined enough to sew, cut down tablecloths into curtains or hack a foam spider into a costume
• Hobbies that don't continue, and offloading them onto other neurodivergent people
• Keeping a "butterfly board" of ideas for later instead of acting on every new interest
• Choosing a hobby that isn't your phone, and that your child can see and join in
• Teaching your own child a skill versus someone else doing it — and perfectionism when they "do it wrong"
• Lego, second-hand sets and the tension between building to the instructions and letting a child play freely
• Different "flavours" of neurodivergence, and a friend who measures every picture before hanging it
• Disney merchandise guilt, "YOLO" shopping and why a spending plan can be derailed by PDA
• Setting project deadlines to give hyperfocus a finish line
• A Facebook Marketplace seller whose hobby-graveyard listings are comedy gold

Key Takeaways

• A new hobby is often a new hyperfocus: intense, fast and not always sustainable. Naming that, rather than judging it, makes it easier to enjoy the burst and let it go when it fades.
• A project with a deadline (shoes to bedazzle before a trip, a costume before Halloween) can give hyperfocus a finish line — as long as it doesn't take over sleep and other priorities.
• A hobby that keeps your hands busy and produces something your child can see can feel better than another hour on a phone — even if your brain keeps running while you stitch.
• Perfectionism shows up in hobbies too: it can be hard to watch your child "do it wrong," and sometimes someone else teaching the skill works better for everyone.
• Outdoors, sunshine, movement and connection — a bike ride and a chat in the sun — can lift the mood of the whole household, even when you don't want to go outside.

Who This Episode Is For

Anyone with a drawer, shelf or crate of half-finished kits and "I'll get back to it" supplies. Parents trying to find a hobby that isn't scrolling. Anyone about to take small children to Disney and already planning outfits, shoes and ears. And anyone who recognises the thrill of "I'm going to work this out" — right up until they don't.

A Message From This Episode

A hobby doesn't have to be finished to count. If it gave you joy, kept your hands busy, or gave you something to do alongside your kid, it did its job — and the hobby graveyard is just proof that you tried things.

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